Martha Randolph Carr Martha Randolph Carr, 4/28/2011 [Archive]

Martha's Big Adventure - It's All About the Pretty

Martha's Big Adventure - It's All About the Pretty

By Martha Randolph Carr

I get the whole fascination with William and Kate's royal wedding. I even get the mixed reactions every time it's mentioned. Women let out a delighted 'oh' and clap their hands. Men groan and roll their eyes. My friend Jenn Gibbons' mother went out and got tiaras that they can decorate themselves and wear in honor of the occasion. My neighbor Matt let out a laugh when he heard of all the going-on.

That's okay, he probably never wore a comforter for a wedding veil either, but somewhere around five years old I was wearing chenille and marching up and down the hallway of a red brick rancher loudly singing the wedding march.

Plenty of grown women all over America are having sleep-overs so they can witness the royal nuptials and exclaim over the dress and all the details together. There is something about fairytales when viewed from a distant that speak not only to true romance but also the idea of dreams coming true.

That's really what all of us are sighing over. Maybe it's not too late for our dreams.

There was a phase I went through not too long ago where I was searching for some spiritual answers in every nook and cranny and as a result I ended up in more than a few sweat lodges where the temperatures could get so high I was putting my hands behind my back to cool off my fingertips.

One frigid Virginia night, right before a small group of us were about to crawl into the turtle-shaped lodge I noticed that one of the women, Dhyana Dunville was wearing makeup. I looked at her in amazement and pointed out it would be pitch black darkness and most makeup would slide right down our faces.

She gave a devilish grin and said, 'It's all about the pretty,' before she ducked down, said a short prayer and crawled on inside. I swear she looked exactly the same on the way out of the lodge well over an hour later. She's always been the sort to try anything but still manage to put her own twist on things.

Dhyana has become like a big sister to me and two months after I up and left for New York City in 2007 she sold every last thing she owned and boarded a plane for Hawaii. She didn't know anyone and had only been there a couple of times before but she wanted to give a new kind of life a try and I encouraged her to go.

No one should live their entire life wondering and it's better to find out something is a no, and change your mind than never try at all.

It was the same reason I was driving north on 95 toward Manhattan with a packed U-Haul. But in 2009 I realized it was time to move again and left for Chicago, again with no regrets. I had such a great time in New York but it was time to move along. However, Dhyana is still in Hawaii hiking behind waterfalls or swimming near seals and she's never looked back. I hear she's starting on a singing career now.

Sure, it's possible to go too far with our bucket list and cross over into irresponsible but sometimes the only person who knows where the line is, is the one who's daring to go for it.

I realize change is scary, particularly when things get a little comfy and it can seem easier to let go of some dreams than risk what we've managed to build. That's how some of us manage to hit middle-aged and wonder what's still possible. However, watching a girl named Kate who was bullied for being different in middle school ride in a glass carriage to marry her prince can remind us of the dreams we once had and make us wonder if they really can come true.

The answer is always yes. In the end they may not look exactly like we planned and there will be rough patches along the way but the adventures weave themselves into something that is uniquely wonderful just for us and really, very pretty. More adventures to follow. Tweet me @MarthaRandolph and let me know how you celebrated the royal wedding. Email Martha at Martha@caglecartoons.com.

© 2011 Martha Randolph Carr. Martha's column is distributed exclusively by Cagle Cartoons Inc. newspaper syndicate. For info call Sales at (805) 969-2829 or email Sales@cagle.com. Download Martha Randolph Carr's black and white mug shot photo.

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