Doug Patton, 10/31/2012 [Archive]

Meanwhile, Back in Benghazi

Meanwhile, Back in Benghazi...

By Doug Patton

The national media must be breathing a collective sigh of relief at having Hurricane Sandy come along to help them avoid covering Benghazigate, the biggest scandal of the most corrupt presidential administration in the last one hundred years — perhaps in American history.

Meanwhile, the new mantra for the surrogates who are still trying to defend this president's actions is this: "After the attacks of September 11, 2001, we all came together and supported our president, and we should do the same now!" Let's try to analyze the nonsense of this statement.

It stretches credibility almost to the breaking point even to compare the actions of President Bush on September 11, 2001, with those of President Obama on September 11, 2012. In order for Bush's deeds on that terrible day to be in any way comparable to what Obama did — or, more accurately, failed to do — on the anniversary of the most deadly attack on American soil, something like the following scenario would have to had taken place.

President Bush is reading to a group of grade school children in Florida when his chief of staff, Andrew Card, whispers in his ear that a jet airliner, possibly piloted by terrorists, has crashed into the north tower of the World Trade Center. The president freezes. He doesn't know what to do. How will this affect him politically?

The president is soon informed that a second plane has struck the south tower, while a third has flown directly into the Pentagon. Later, he is told that United Airlines Flight 93 is now in the hands of terrorists somewhere in the skies over Pennsylvania. It is apparent that this plane is headed back to Washington, DC, to crash into either the White House or the U.S. Capitol Building.

Bush and his advisors soon become aware that a brave group of passengers aboard Flight 93 are planning to storm the cockpit and retake the aircraft. Huddled with his aides, Bush orders them to tell those passengers to "stand down." They are not to try and retake that aircraft under any circumstances, the president decrees. Todd Beamer, the leader of the group, and his fellow heroes, ignore the president's order. With the battle cry, "let's roll," they charge the cockpit. Whether at the hands of the terrorists or Beamer and his courageous friends, the plane crashes into a field near Shanksville, Pennsylvania, thereby foiling the attack on another American landmark.

Overnight, the president concocts a story to tell the American people. He calls a press conference and informs the world, "Yesterday, an attack was perpetrated upon our soil that appears to have been completely random and spontaneous. In looking at the reasons for this violence, it has come to my attention that the Islamic world is rightfully outraged by an episode of the animated television series 'South Park.' This episode, which aired earlier this summer, depicts the Prophet Mohammad in an unflattering light and is inexcusable. My administration wants Muslims around the world to know that the United States government had nothing to do with producing, promoting or airing this cartoon show, and that we apologize for the offensive nature of it."

The following Sunday, George Bush sends United Nations Ambassador John Negroponte to every network talk show to repeat the lie that it was the Comedy Central cartoon show that caused the attacks of 9/11.

And finally, at the funerals of the victims of the 9/11 attacks, Secretary of State Colin Powell tells Todd Beamer's wife, Lisa, that the Bush administration is going to hunt down Trey Parker and Matt Stone, the co-creators of "South Park," and arrest them.

Do you believe for one moment that the media, the American people, or anyone in their right mind would have bought into that whopper? Well, Barack Obama thinks you are just that stupid.

Now go out and vote, America!

©2012 by Doug Patton - Doug Patton describes himself as a recovering political speechwriter who agrees with himself more often than not. Now working as a freelance writer, his weekly columns are syndicated exclusively by Cagle Cartoons newspaper syndicate. Astute supporters and inane detractors alike are encouraged to email him with their pithy comments at dpatton@cagle.com. For info on using his column at your publication or website, please email Sales at sales@cagle.com.

This column has been edited by the author. Representations of fact and opinions are solely those of the author.



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